nucmednet Chapter 60, Paper Love
Chapter 60, Paper Love
The most famous square in Paris is Place de la Concorde, as dusk settles in.
In tourist brochures, this name is always accompanied by photos of blue skies and white clouds, with the obelisk gleaming golden in the sunlight, fountain sprays creating rainbows in the air, and the distant Eiffel Tower standing like a silent giant overlooking the entire city.
But in Paris at the end of March, the sky was grayish-white, like a photograph that had been washed too many times, its colors faded.
Yang Yang had been sitting on the stone steps at the edge of the square for more than two hours.
His face was expressionless, but his complexion was abnormally pale, the kind of pale that looked like "the blood had drained away."
His lips were so dry that a thin layer of skin had formed, and a small crack had appeared from the wind, though he himself was unaware of it.
He was abandoned.
Two hours ago, the cast of "Divas Hit the Road" Season 2 finished their rowing training and prepared to return to their accommodations in batches.
In the chaos, he missed getting a ride.
My phone was dead, I didn't bring my iPad, I didn't know the hotel address, I had no money, and I didn't have a map.
The production crew's car followed him the whole time, and the camera's red light was on, indicating that someone was filming him.
He didn't get in the car, thinking his sisters would come back to pick him up.
He felt that this was a team, and they wouldn't abandon him.
He also refused the help from the production crew's vehicle that was following him, insisting on waiting where he was.
But they didn't come.
The sky changed from grayish-white to grayish-blue, and then from grayish-blue to a deep, cool indigo.
The number of tourists in the square dwindled, and pigeons wandered around his feet, occasionally cooing as if asking, "Why are you still here?"
He just stood there, occasionally squatting down, occasionally sitting for a while, but he couldn't sit still.
Yang Yang buried her face in her knees and took a deep breath.
He recalled that when they set off that morning, the sun was shining brightly, and everyone was chatting and laughing.
He recalled that during training that afternoon, he rowed with the most effort, until his arms ached.
He recalled that before coming to France, he had specifically learned a few French phrases: "Bonjour," "Merci," and "Je t'aime."
He didn't need the first three sentences, and for the last one, he didn't know who to say it to.
Just then, he heard a voice.
It's in Chinese and includes singing.
To be precise, it was a guitar intro, followed by the sound of someone speaking in Chinese.
"This song is dedicated to my forever leading lady, Little Ear."
Yang Yang's body stiffened for a moment.
Little ears?
"Left Ear".
The role played by Chen Duling.
That movie.
The movie he had auditioned for.
That role he once really wanted but ultimately didn't get.
Yang Yang lifted his face off his knees and glanced in the direction from which the sound came.
On the other side of the square, near the fountain, a small group of people had gathered.
There weren't many, only a dozen or so, but it was already considered lively for this time of year.
The guitar continued to play, the melody simple yet catchy, like someone walking slowly in the twilight, unhurried and calm, accompanied by pleasant whistling.
Yang Yang was already feeling very unwell.
Hearing those words made me feel even worse.
He remembers the audition for "The Left Ear" very clearly.
He made extensive preparations, reading the original novel, writing character biographies, and even practicing the scene of Xu Yi's downfall dozens of times in front of the mirror.
He felt he acted well, and director Alec Su praised him, saying he had talent.
But in the end, he wasn't the one who got the role.
It was Gao Huan.
Yang Yang didn't know Gao Huan at that time.
He had only heard that a newcomer, good-looking and a good actor, had emerged from a bunch of competitors and won Xu Yi's heart.
Later, he saw "Swords of Legends" on TV, saw Baili Tusu, and saw that face.
He had to admit that the other face was a bit more handsome than his.
But it's only a little!
Yang Yang felt another tightness in his chest.
He didn't want to stand up, didn't want to walk over, didn't want to see that person.
But he still stood up and slowly walked in that direction.
The noise from the crowd was even louder than before.
There were twenty or thirty people, including tourists, locals, and a few young people taking pictures with their phones.
The air was filled with the melody of a guitar and the voice of someone singing. The voice was very emotionally engaging, and the singing had the power to "send the song into people's hearts".
Yang Yang squeezed through the gap in the crowd and saw that person.
Gao Huan.
He was wearing a black windbreaker, the hood was not pulled up, and his hair was a little messy from the wind.
Chen Duling stood in front of him, holding a cup of coffee that had gone cold.
Just a few minutes earlier, Gao Huan had finished speaking with a street performer.
The old Frenchman was sitting on the steps next to the fountain, holding an old guitar, with a few coins scattered in the guitar case in front of him.
When Gao Huan walked over, the old man was bending over and tuning the instrument. The strings made a broken sound under his rough fingertips, like someone coughing.
Gao Huan squatted down and asked him in English if he could borrow his guitar to play a song.
The old man looked up at him, paused for a moment, and was taken aback.
Then he smiled, revealing a few slightly crooked teeth, handed over the guitar, and said in French, "Here, take it, young man."
Gao Huan understood; he knew a little French.
Gao Huan took the guitar and sat on the small stool the old man had given him.
He first played a few chords to test the sound, but the guitar's pitch was not good; several strings were off-key.
He bent down and adjusted it, then played it again, and this time it was correct.
His hands were large, with distinct knuckles.
Chen Duling stood directly in front of him, no more than a step away.
She didn't know what he was going to sing, but she knew he was going to sing it for her.
She simply stood there, like a jasmine planted on the stone steps, bathed in the soft light of twilight, with delicate features, pure and frosty, exuding a serene and ethereal aura.
The wind blew, her hair fluttered, and her heart stirred.
Gao Huan looked up and glanced at her.
"This song," he said, not loudly, but with surprisingly good sound pickup from the beat-up guitar, "is dedicated to my forever leading lady, Little Ear."
Chen Duling's eyelashes trembled.
"Little Ear" is her role in "The Left Ear".
That was where they met, the place where she first saw him.
The guitar intro begins, the melody is simple but catchy, like a person walking slowly in the twilight.
Gao Huan started singing; it was in English.
The English song "Paper Love" was released in 2017 by Canadian singer Allie x from the original timeline.
Of course, in this world, it's the song he originally wrote for Dudu.
"I've been watching you for days now…"
The guitar chords seemed to come alive under his fingers; every note vibrated in the air like freshly blown cotton candy, still warm. You dared not touch it, but wanted to look at it a few more times and then devour it.
"Is there any other way now?
I don't want to walk away now.
I'm not ready for the letdown.」
Chen Duling's eyes began to sting.
The crowd slowly gathered.
At first there were a few people, then a dozen, and then dozens.
There were tourists, locals, and a few young people taking pictures with their phones.
No one spoke; everyone stared at the young man sitting on a small stool, clutching an old guitar.
Chen Duling's eyes reddened.
She wanted to endure it, but she couldn't.
Because his eyes were always on her, and it wasn't the kind of look that said "I'm looking at you," but rather the kind that said "I can only see you."
The crowd was behind him, the square was behind him, Paris was behind him, but his eyes were only on her.
Tears fell down.
One, two, and then a bunch.
She didn't wipe it away; she just watched him cry.
Tears clung to her eyelashes, chilled by the wind in the square, and trickled down her skin, tickling her, but she didn't reach out to wipe them away.
She was afraid that if she wiped it, he wouldn't see that she was crying.
She wanted him to see it.
"Tell me lies, give me paper love.
Cover my eyes, like you're not enough.
I'll take the bruises, take the cuts.
If it means that I'm enough."
Chen Duling understood the sentence, "If it means that I'm enough."
If I am good enough.
If I were what you wanted.
If I could let you stay.
She recalled asking him on the set of "The Left Ear," "Will you remember me?" and he said yes.
She didn't know if he would, but she would.
She will never forget those days at the Chedun Film and Television Base, nor will she forget the thermos cup he handed her, the mole at the corner of his eye when he smiled, or the way he knelt down to shield her from everyone's gaze when she had a nosebleed.
He probably just did those things casually.
But for her, those things weren't "casual".
Some people in the crowd were taking photos, and some were recording videos.
Chen Duling couldn't see anything; her eyes were only on Gao Huan.
Yang Yang heard it too.
He walked over from the other side of the square at some point, perhaps attracted by the singing, or perhaps he was at his wit's end and didn't know where to go.
He stood on the periphery of the crowd, not pushing his way in, just standing there.
His face was still pale, almost grayish, like a piece of paper that had been soaked in water and dried, wrinkled and impossible to smooth out.
He understood the lyrics; after all, his English wasn't bad.
He understood every sentence, every word.
"I've been watching you for days now..." He recalled the two hours he had waited, waiting for a group of people who would never return.
"I don't want to walk away now..." He didn't want to leave; he didn't know where to go.
"Not ready for the letdown..." He wasn't ready to be left behind.
Yang Yang stood there without moving after listening to the chorus.
His eyes didn't redden; he held back his tears.
But his face turned even paler, so pale that his lips almost lost their color.
He thought of "The Left Ear" again.
I think of Xu Yi.
I think of that role he had been preparing for for a long time, but ultimately didn't get.
He thought of the girl standing at the front of the crowd now, being confessed to by this song; she was the female lead in the role he auditioned for.
In the movie, Xu Yi failed to win Xiao Erduo's heart, but in real life, Gao Huan sang a song for her in front of everyone in a square in Paris.
He couldn't hear what she said, but he saw her lips moving.
He said something, but he couldn't hear it; however, he saw him smile.
Yang Yang looked away.
He neither left nor pushed forward.
He stood there, like a wooden stake nailed to the spot, unmoved by the wind or pushed by the crowd.
He didn't know where to go, just like when he was abandoned in the square.
He didn't know if the production crew's car was still waiting for him.
He didn't know how to face his older sisters when he got back.
He knows nothing.
All he knew was that the song was very nice.
It's so beautiful it makes your heart ache.
……
On the other side of the square, Wu Mengzhi, the co-director of "Divas Hit the Road," stood behind the camera monitor, holding a walkie-talkie, her eyes following Gao Huan and Chen Duling.
Her eyelids twitched when she saw Chen Duling crying on the monitor.
She works in variety shows, and being moved is the least valuable thing to her.
What she saw were materials, topics, and things that would go viral after airing, things that everyone would want to click and watch.
……
Gao Huan finished singing the last note.
The guitar's lingering notes floated in the air for a few seconds before dissipating.
The crowd fell silent for a moment, then applause erupted—applause that came from the heart, a genuine expression of appreciation.
Chen Duling wiped her tears with her sleeve, covering her face.
She cried quite ugly, but she didn't care.
Gao Huan looked at her and the corners of his mouth curved slightly.
He handed the guitar back to the old Frenchman, stood up, and walked towards Chen Duling.
The crowd behind him parted and then gathered like the tide.
Someone recognized him, someone called out "Gao Huan", but he didn't turn around.
He walked up to Chen Duling, reached out, and wiped away the tears that hadn't been wiped from her face.
The movement was very gentle; his thumb slid from her cheekbone to the corner of her eye, wiping away the tear stain.
"Why are you crying?" he said, even though he knew why she was crying.
"Mind your own business," Chen Duling sniffed, her voice muffled.
Gao Huan smiled, withdrew his hand, and put it in his pocket.
"Let's go, I need Yangyang Jin to come over there to take care of some things. We'll wait for her to arrive."
Chen Duling nodded, turned her head, and saw a person standing on the outer edge of the crowd.
Yang Yang.
He stood there like a tree planted in the wrong place, its roots not taking hold and its leaves not growing.
His face was ashen in the twilight, his lips were cracked, and his eyes were empty.
Chen Duling was stunned for a moment.
She recognized Yang Yang; she had acted alongside him during the audition for "The Left Ear".
A strange feeling welled up inside her.
Chen Duling wiped away her tears and smiled.
Gao Huan looked at her, a slight smile playing on his lips, but didn't stand up. He handed the guitar back to the street performer next to him.
Yang Yang stood in the crowd, watching Gao Huan stand up, watching him walk to Chen Duling's side, watching her tiptoe and whisper something in his ear, watching him bend down slightly to listen, and watching the distance between the two of them.
Not too close, not too far, just the right amount of ambiguity to make onlookers feel a pang of jealousy.
……
Just as Gao Huan began singing, Wu Mengzhi, the co-director of "Divas Hit the Road," was gesturing to the cameraman to come closer, a little closer.
Gao Huan sensed the camera.
He's not the kind of person who's insensitive to cameras.
On the contrary, his sensitivity to the camera far exceeds that of ordinary people.
He didn't look directly at her, but finished what he was doing first. He wiped away Chen Duling's tears, returned the guitar to the street performer, took out his phone from his pocket, and sent a message to Yangyang Jinfa:
"There's someone filming at Concorde Square. It's probably the crew from the 'Divas Hit the Road' program. Can you come and handle this?"
Then he looked up and glanced in the direction of the camera.
His gaze swept over the crowd, over the cameras, over the passersby holding up their phones, and landed on Wu Mengzhi.
Wu Mengzhi was watching the playback behind the monitor when she felt that gaze. She looked up and her eyes met Gao Huan's.
The two stared at each other for about two seconds.
Gao Huan neither smiled nor nodded, and his expression remained unchanged.
He glanced at her briefly, then looked away.
Wu Mengzhi's finger paused on the monitor for a moment, hesitated, then picked up the walkie-talkie and said in a low voice, "Turn off the machine, you guys go back first."
The cameramen were taken aback for a moment, but their professionalism prevented them from asking any further questions. The red light on the camera went out, and they carried the camera and began to back away.
The movements were neither fast nor slow, like the receding tide, unhurried and calm, until everything was completely gone.