nucmednet Chapter 1085 He is her calming incense
Chapter 1085 He is her calming incense
It’s not like we’ve slept together before! Ma Chuyang felt both aggrieved and comforted when he heard this.
Yes, yes, they had indeed slept together, and more than once. But when she said "sleep," she meant real sleep, pure sleep, peaceful sleep.
He was her calming incense.
That was many years ago. After Chi Shuang came back from a trip to Guicheng, he could always hear the sound of clashing swords.
War horses neighed, arrows flew through the air... these sounds always exploded in her ears suddenly, keeping her awake all night long until dawn.
At the beginning, Chi Shuang would close her eyes and feel her brother's tragedy and despair.
She has always been unwilling to be a burden to others, and she feels that tinnitus is just a minor illness, so why make a fuss about it?
But as time went on, the noises grew more intense, gnawing at her bones and heart. She endured it day after day, until the buzzing in her ears gradually became an impenetrable net, isolating herself from all the outside sounds.
When people spoke, she could only see their lips opening and closing, but the sound seemed to come from far away, making it sound unreal.
It was the middle of winter in Tiema City that year. The Northern Wing court had just moved its capital, and the Duke of Protectorate's Mansion had already been settled.
But Chi Shuang was worried that her godmother would find out, so she found many excuses not to move back to the Duke of Huguo's Mansion, but instead lived in a small courtyard in Shi Anxia's previous inn.
Ma Chuyang went to find her and discovered something.
The situation was so serious by then that she could only guess when talking to him.
He noticed that during their conversations, she would unconsciously tilt her head, her right ear tilted toward the source of the sound. Sometimes she would answer questions irrelevantly, and sometimes she would simply smile silently. Later, he realized that she was actually relying on lip reading to get along with him.
Ma Chuyang was shocked and immediately went to find Shen Siyuan.
Shen Siyuan rushed over overnight to administer acupuncture and medication, and three days later, Chi Shuang smiled and said she understood more clearly. But Ma Chuyang clearly saw that she was still secretly clutching her sleeves, calculating the rhythm of other people's conversations.
Ma Chuyang knew that this disease would not be cured overnight, and was worried that she would not take the medicine seriously, so he discussed with Wu Qicheng whether they could temporarily exchange positions.
Wu Qicheng was so righteous that he submitted a memorial to the court overnight regarding the rotation of garrison guards.
From then on, Ma Chuyang trained his troops in the military camp, and every now and then he would ride his horse to see Chi Shuang at night, watching her drink the medicine before leaving.
In fact, he didn't really leave, but climbed over the wall to enter the courtyard under the cover of night, sometimes hiding on the beams, sometimes squatting behind the screen.
Chi Shuang didn't notice it at first.
Later, perhaps because Ma Chuyang was too tired from running around, he curled up in a corner of her room and fell asleep. His snoring startled Chi Shuang.
She didn't know whether to laugh or cry, but she was also grateful for his sincerity, so she didn't blame him, but allowed him to rest on the couch for a while.
I don’t know if it was because Doctor Shen’s medicine took effect, or because having another person in the room made people feel at ease, but Chi Shuang slept soundly that night.
From then on, there was a soft couch covered with fox fur in the room.
Ma Chuyang is a medicine that can calm the mind.
As time went by, Chi Shuang felt that she had delayed Ma Chuyang, so she secretly went to Liang State to open a bookstore.
She didn't want Ma Chuyang to work so hard.
Ma Chuyang, however, felt that Chi Shuang was ungrateful because he had to travel even harder, and even to see her, he had to cross the country.
When he was in Liang State, he refused to leave and continued to sleep in her room. Because she was targeted by many talented men in Liang State, Ma Chuyang was furious.
Once, after a big quarrel between them, he entered her account.
That night, they slept together.
He hugged her and asked her to marry him.
They didn't cross the line, they just hugged each other and talked for a long time.
It was the first time Chi Shuang had been so close to a man, and her heart was inexplicably moved. She had always... never considered him a man.
Even as if he were her younger brother, even though he was actually older than her.
Even though Ma Chuyang always says "shameless", Chi Shuang actually knows that this guy is a very shameless person in his heart.
So "slept together" really means just sleeping together. Ma Chuyang wanted to get married properly, and he was willing to go through the formalities of marriage after three matchmakers and six betrothals.
He doesn't want to be a man like Lao Ma who can't control his lower body!
As he grew older, he became more and more disgusted with Lao Ma's behavior of picking up any woman and sleeping with her to have a baby.
Ma Chuyang had made up his mind that he would learn how to be a good person and become a prince consort. He had been kind to his cousin for many years and was loyal and devoted.
The home was harmonious and warm, free from all the messy and dirty things. This was the kind of home he wanted.
Ma Chuyang leaned over Chi Shuang's couch, his chin resting on his folded arms, like a stubborn puppy, "Shuang'er, do you really not like me?"
Chi Shuang closed her eyes again and whispered, "I like it."
Who wouldn't like such a handsome and sincere man? She wasn't blind, nor was she heartless.
"If you like me, then why don't you marry me?" Ma Chuyang was so anxious that he tried to grab her wrist, but he didn't dare to use force and just circled it lightly.
Chi Shuang stood up, the sunlight filtering through the cabin veil making her eyes and brows soften. "Chu Yang, I'm already over thirty."
"Then what's wrong?" Ma Chuyang was even more puzzled. "I'm older than you, and I'm over 30."
"You are a man," Chi Shuang looked into his bright and beautiful eyes, "you are now at the best age in a man's life, don't waste it on me. Find a good girl to marry and have children, that's the real thing."
She was no longer able to do that. At her age, having a child would be dangerous.
If she were still in her early twenties, she might have married him without hesitation.
But at that time, she didn't like him.
By the time she realized she liked him, she had already reached such an awkward age.
Chi Shuang cannot marry.
Because she would not risk her life to have a child for anyone, not even Ma Chuyang.
She lived not only for herself, but also for her parents and her brother. She actually valued her life very much and was unwilling to gamble with it for something that was difficult to control.
She lowered her eyes to look at the obedient and well-behaved man in front of her, and patiently explained all this to him, "I like you, but I like myself more."
This was the first time she had said it so clearly.
She is a selfish person who always thinks about herself.
She was different from Ma Chuyang. She had been looked down upon since childhood and had no family. If she didn't love herself, no one else could love her.
"I once thought of marrying you, taking a concubine for you, and having children for you. But I can't do that, Chu Yang. I can't bear to see you flirting with other women under the same roof."
Ma Chuyang asked, "Are you done?"
Chi Shuang nodded, her eyes cold and serene. She was well-controlled, calm and composed, without much reluctance.
Ma Chuyang raised his eyebrows, "Isn't it because of the talented man surnamed Zheng from Liang State?"
Chi Shuang was unhappy, "Of course not, I've said it countless times, I'm not familiar with him."
"What about the talented man surnamed Zeng? What about the one surnamed Bai? What about the one surnamed Fang?" Ma Chuyang counted them one after another, and it was obvious that he was extremely dissatisfied with these people.
He was in the North Wing, far away, and often felt powerless, unable to reach out. "If it weren't for them, you wouldn't have to worry. My mother's only request for me was to get married, not to have children..."